This month re-teaches a lesson we’ve surely learned before, but sometimes the most valuable wisdom bears repeating: It ain’t supposed to be that hard.
There is someone in our lives (or maybe you are the mysterious someone...?) who keeps their treasure locked tight. They say you have to spend money to make money; they say you have to give to receive; they say as you give, so shall it be given unto you. I don’t know who they are but they can keep dropping jewels until they’re blue in the face because (they also say) you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink. Common sense ain’t common. A hard head makes a soft behind. Keep doing what you're doing, you gon’ get what you got.
Somebody (or is it you??) is as stubborn as a donkey giving birth. They ain’t finna budge no way, no how. Maybe they’ve given too many inches & have watched folks take too many miles. Whatever their backstory, the future is now. So what are you gonna do? They say you can’t beat a dead horse. You can’t squeeze blood from a turnip. If it dont’ fit, don’t force it, just relax & let it go.
It will hurt, walking away from something when you tried so damn hard, but at least you can comfort yourself knowing you gave it everything you had. When you give everything you have, you are supposed to receive a bountiful reward. That’s how life works. If you give something or someone everything you have & all they do is… take it… well that is unnatural & unreasonable. That is some twisted shit. That is not how life works.
Over the next 30 days, life wants to show you reciprocity. You have given much, & it is time for you to receive, as long as you can accept that you will never receive from those to whom you’ve been giving. Once you release the idea of what could have been, you will move with relief into the ease you deserve.
And if you are the stubborn mysterious someone, taking all & giving none…your free ride is o-v-e-r.
It’s ‘bout to get rough.
Writing this message is difficult for me. Not to get too personal... but it's hard to concentrate because I am angry about SO MANY THINGS. Rage brims up inside my throat from choking on words I thought had died, but now appear suddenly, undeniably alive. It's that thing where you become afraid to speak, out of fear that every word will be laced with venom, each syllable a pronunciation of spite.
Sidenote: DId you know that psychic folks (like you, like me) experience difficulty determining whether what they are feeling is coming from themselves or others? It's true! We're walking antennae; sometimes we don't know if the noise we emit is an original transmission or simply an echo of what we've received. This is especially the case when it comes to self-doubt, trust issues, crying spells, tantrums, low self-esteem & negative repetitive thought loops.
In other words, we can feel really, really mad at somebody, when the truth is that they are really, really mad at us.
We can feel overwhelmed with love (to the point of obsessive thoughts) for someone, when really, they can't stop thinking about us.
We can feel worthless, hopeless & suicidal, when the truth is that our light threatens someone else's darkness, our potential showcases the fact that someone else has squandered their gifts, & the life in our eyes makes someone else want to die.
While it seems unfair & is most certainly illogical, that's not even the worst of it. Ultimately, it's a DISTRACTION, a pensive brain fog that renders our purpose invisible & our progress pointless. For the next 30 days, if we find ourselves overcome with negativity, it's an obvious indication that we are (...or were, anyway) on our way to bigger & better things.
To counteract: have you ever noticed that when you're deeply engaged in a meaningful task, the world (within & without/ above & below) quiets to a hum?
Getting (& staying!) busy with our soul purpose will be the only way to silence these psychic attacks.
& How will we know the difference between vampires & the victims?
Easy. Suckers have nothing (literally, nothing) but time.
This month is about Justice in every conceivable way. It's about getting what we deserve, what we've earned.
Imagine you go to a restaurant because you're starving. You place your order & wait a bit. Then you wait a bit more. People around you are eating while your table remains bare. Upon closer observation you see that while it's true that many have their food, you are not the only one waiting. Where first you were furious, now you are curious. You tiptoe to the kitchen & see it is void of its typical bustling activity, although ingredients are sprawled profusely, in various stages of prep. Helplessly nosy, you venture inside. Before you can investigate further, you hear an interior door slam. The chef has just quickly re-entered & you can hear the familiar rustle of a bag filled with fresh produce.
Dinner is on!
You creep back to your table undetected & sit patiently with a smug grin. You know the food will be hot & fresh, despite the delay.
Meanwhile, those without your peaceful assurance have made some interesting choices.
Some have filled up so much on bread & water, they'll have no space in their tummies for the delicacies soon to arrive.
Others remained at the table, yet assuming the food would never come, ordered huge meals from elsewhere. Regardless of whether they can stomach their double portion, they're on the hook to pay for it all.
When the waiters finally emerge with the courses, there is a collective wave of surprise. In one way or another, everyone is too full from their own actions to enjoy the goods.
Except you, who had the inside scoop, who kept the blessing to yourself because no one would have believed you anyway.
Oh well. For the next 30 days, your belly is full.
(Worth the wait.)
This month is about mastery.
We have spent many cycles trying, crying, struggling, striving in vain to make a certain something work. Despite our disappointment we didn't give up. As a result we learned to improvise, reorganize, wiggle. Survive.
As a result, no matter what comes towards us now, either in thought, word or deed, we're equipped to confiscate & appropriate for our best & highest good. Like the proprietor of a pawnshop, we can keep it, use it or sell it. Either way it's a boon.
Over the next 30 days we might have to deal with folks who GO BY THE BOOK, but when it's all said and done, they will have to go BUY the book. Your book. Because the sheer volume of your hard won wisdom has given you permission to rewrite the rules.
The fact that all roads led to dead ends for so long turned out to be a blessing in disguise.
Where others would have given up, you created a lane.
Now all roads lead to you.
It's a myth that perfection is akin to progress. And even if progress amounted to doing things exactly, perfectly right the first time- what would you have you really learned? How do you know if its a matter of skill or just dumb luck?
Over the next 30 days, we may find ourselves facing the same terrain we've covered over & over again- yet no matter how many times we put mountains in our rear-view mirror, somehow they're still mysteriously, mischievously looming up ahead. This month (indulge my car analogy for a bit, yeah?) we are being asked to pull over, ditch the ride & walk. All this time we've been white-knuckle gripping the steering wheel- worrying if our car can carry us over each incline, worrying if we'll run out of gas, worrying if we'll find food, clothes, shelter, landmarks, on this endlessly difficult route.
We believed that just around the bend we could finally stop this nefarious merry-go-round & relax as the lane flattened into easy street. And yet, joke's on us because despite all the care, seriousness & zero fun (we'll have fun when we GET THERE!), the road is the same, we're no closer to our original destination, & we've navigated so many twists & turns we no longer know where we are, let alone if we're close to where we thought we were headed.
Regardless, we are getting older & the hour groweth late. Despite the lack of "progress," our tunnel vision widens. Suddenly we are drawn to the lushness of the trees, the clarity of the sky, the flowers yearning to be admired, the babble of brooks & the lure of hidden paths demanding to be explored. Whereas we searched fruitlessly for signs affirming we were "getting somewhere," it suddenly dawns on us that we've always been in the only place there is: HERE & NOW.
And we're missing it.
This month, instead of zooming through life as fast as we can so that those coming behind can eat our dust, why not show them how our footsteps loop around & around each other, back & forth, in a cosmic divine design? Why not show them how when we kick up our heels & choose to dance, even the dirt dances with us?
The message for this month is simple- so simple in fact, that I'm not sure if I can pontificate for a couple of paragraphs when the stars & the cards are so clearly calling for us to say less. Whatever needs to be said in July has already been said, & even if it hasn't been said it's most certainly been understood, & what is understood does not need to be explained.
But you came for a show, so I'mma give you a show. (That's part of the message too...)
Imagine: A sweet young woman relaxing at home. She's in her comfy clothes, a cup of coffee steaming on the counter, sunlight pouring through the blinds. From somewhere in the house, music is playing softly. Issa vibe.
Suddenly there's a knock at the door.
The way the woman jolts out of her reverie & peers at the door alerts you to the fact that her mornings have not always been so peaceful. She creeps to the door & stares out of the peephole. Then she tests the locks. Satisfied they'll hold, a weight visibly falls from her shoulders. She returns to her coffee, her couch, her warm patch of sun.
The knocking comes again, louder this time. The woman jumps a bit, but not like before. She doesn't move except to grab the remote next to her coffee. The knock becomes a pound. An angry voice shouts, commanding her to open the damn door. She uses the remote to turn music up. Every time there is a knock or a shout, the music goes louder. Suddenly the cycle is interrupted by the sound of breaking glass. Whoever couldn't get in through the door has thrown a brick through the window. The curtain billows with silent wind. She mutes the music, reaches for a locked box under the coffee table, balances a huge loaded gun on her lap. From the hallway, a big dog with bigger teeth appears. He positions himself directly under the window, waiting on whoever is thinking about climbing their ass inside. In the silence, all you hear is the woman's measured breaths, the dog's throaty growls & the warning click of her gun, locked, loaded & ready to go off.
The knocks stop for good. No shadows darken the window frame either.
This month, little is said but the message is received. Like it or not, folks catch on quick.
(I can show you better than I can tell you)
This month asks the question, "What do you give to the person who has everything?" (But first, pat yourself on the back for having to ask the question- because if you're in the vicinity of someone who has everything, you're in the right place, you dig?) Anyway-
A clue to discerning what to give the person who has everything lies in understanding how/why they have everything in the first place, especially if no one gave it to them. Self-made folks are rarely self-made by choice or without trauma. Typically self-reliance is a last resort, on the heels of the heart-rending realization that no one is coming, no one cares & your survival depends solely on you & God.
Therefore a person who has everything has learned how to trust their own mind & execute their own plans. And when those plans pan out (despite the fact that NO ONE thought they would) , this is someone who eats the whole pan alone (because you didn't show up when I needed this dough & you ain't finna help me spend this bread). Which brings me to my second point about folks who have everything: they usually have no one to share it with.
Over the next 30 days, we will be guided to contemplate the price of faith, the cost of loyalty & the value of appreciation. If we possess these qualities, we shouldn't be alarmed that some fortunate someone would spend their last dime to experience our esoteric abundance.
But fickle buyers beware: EVEN EXCHANGES ONLY. Regarding those who offer nothing except restrictions in return for our limitlessness, we can't afford to accept their offer, no matter how much money is on the line.
Unless we're swapping recipes, soul food is NOT for sale.
Most fairy tales start the same: once upon a time, long ago & far away, bippity boopity boop, this dream is for blonde girls, not for you.
We know with our rational mind that fairy tales aren't for real, but you'd be surprised how we subconsciously believe they are. We've (mostly) eliminated the possibility of a white knight rescue, but we've woven ourselves elsewhere in the yarn- as the quiet bookkeeper for instance, or the kitchen maid with the piping hot tea.
It's a school play where the main roles were given to the popular kids, & the rest of us are either part of the set or bored in the front row. Even if we're lucky enough to make it on stage (as a shrub or a tree, don't get excited), ain't nobody clapping for us. In fact, we're so busy blocking out distractions & being still, that we've totally checked out of the storyline. We don't even know what page of the script they're on.
Or that some radical, earth loving nature lover, snuck in & revised the story, making your tree the star of the show.
Since this is unprecedented territory, our celebrity has nothing to do with our lines. Everything we say is precisely right. We can do no wrong. The audience is bored of the king & queen routine, rotating the same tired phrases & flaunting the same old robes. It's easy to repeat what someone else wrote, like a ventriloquist doll (cue the crowd, laugh at the dummy), but it's much harder to do what you've done all along, which is to simply be yourself. Slowly the realization dawns that the spectators can't take their eyes off you, even if all you do is breathe.
Confused, the director takes note: viewers transfixed by what's behind the scenes??
Meanwhile, telling the main characters they're obsolete?? Those are the opening lines to a whole other story.
(Congratulations, you played yourself)
If you are reading this Monthly Word of mine, chances are this isn’t your first time. You might have noticed that these messages are cryptic & heavy on the metaphor. If you are a Constant Reader (shout out to Stephen King), you’ve likely made peace with the Words not making sense to you until later, if ever. To be honest, even though I write the posts, I don’t always understand them myself. These messages come to me & through me but they are not mine. There is no discrimination, either in the reception or the transmission. Once the information is deciphered, anyone can tune in, regardless of their comprehension. Or intention.
So. If these Words are warnings, then those who are in danger may read them, as well as the very same folks being warned against. If these are predictions, then those who want them to come true may read them, as well as those who don’t want them to come true. No matter how good a plan is, if the opps overhear, it’s going to be thwarted. This is why no matter how many tools of divination we have at our disposal, the fact is the future is not yet written. Our power lies in one place only: NOW.
And the best part is that it is always now. You will do well to remember that, Constant Reader, regardless of your intention. If you are the Warned, then hopefully you have read between the lines all these months, & you have (despite all opps & odds) done what you needed to do. If you haven’t, read again: the time is NOW. Your power is NOW. Guard your heart, gird your loins & get it done.
However if you are the Danger, it should be dawning on you (right about now) that your time is up. Your stolen blueprints, down to the last detail, were coded for your demise. In your arrogance, did you fail to notice your castles were built on quicksand? Were you too busy rushing up to your towers, that you didn’t notice a wobble in the stairs? Quicksand isn’t like in the movies, silly rabbit. In real life, the sinking happens so slowly, you barely notice...until it's too late.
Oh well, the sand is past the locks now, higher than the doors. The windows you so cleverly designed to let secrets in yet keep reality out, will never open widely enough for your escape. Yet they are still so pristine, so crystal clear. From solid ground, we can see your panicked confusion. Your shouts ring out for miles. Desperately you cling to the last word you overheard:
One of my favorite movies is Kill Bill Vol. 2. Most of you have likely seen it, but indulge me if you haven't:
It stars Uma Thurman as "The Bride," a deadly assassin codenamed: Black Mamba. A continuation of Vol. 1, the sequel provides her back story. I won't detail the saga too much here, but suffice it to say, she is a woman who has been very, very wronged, & she is on a personal mission to make it right. There is a scene where two men, afraid of her vengeance (rightfully so), briefly get the better of Black Mamba by burying her alive in a coffin. They don't just want her to die, they want her to suffer. At this point in the movie, the audience realizes our heroine is in serious trouble. She is facing impossible odds & quickly running out of time.
In this (literally) breathless moment, the movie cuts away to scenes of Black Mamba's years-long training with Taoist Priest Pai Mei. She arrives a young, eager, already accomplished (read: arrogant) fighter, & he quickly deflates her ego by nearly snapping her wrist with a flick of his finger. She realizes she has much to learn, & humbles tf outta herself. During her extensive, bloody, exhausting, humiliating tutelage, Pai Mei teaches Black Mamba that the deadliest assassins kill up close & quiet, after luring their prey into striking distance. She learns the two subtle, effective tactics that eventually save her life & assure her vengeance: the three finger punch & the five finger exploding heart technique.
Once the audience understands the extent of her mastery, the movie cuts back to our heroine, still buried. She uses a knife hidden in her boot to slash her hands free, & then three-finger-punches the coffin until it snaps. Then she claws out of six feet of dirt & emerges filthy but alive.
Over the last few months or years (take it how it resonates), you may have questioned why the Most High Pai Mei put you through such grueling tests & challenges. You may have cried yourself to sleep many nights & struggled bewildered through your days.
Do you see now that God saw fit to prepare you for danger you couldn't possibly fathom? Can you recognize that your life was a sword in the Lord's hand being sharpened for battle?
We may have wondered why the Creator allowed our assailants to wound us & gloat in our misfortune while circling in for the kill; yet at the last moment our training kicks to remind us we are the danger (ha!) not them. Though our hearts thump we lie still, luring the over-confident enemy closer. We cough & splutter, whispering a bloody "last" word until they bring their ears to our lips, fatally dismissing our hands. Gotcha.
(Touch not my anointed, do my prophets no harm- Psalm 105:15)
A monthly message, alchemized/ channeled from tarot cards, seasoned with intuition and life experience, served with love.