This week is about fucking up. The ways others have failed us, the ways we've failed them, and the ways we have all failed ourselves. It's okay. This week - and I get the feeling it's bout to be a long ass week- but the thing that makes it move faster is allowing ourselves to move on from our fuckups. Life is a game and players fuck up. What's the point of wallowing when we could be playing again to win? Did we give up or naw? So we getting up or what?
Whatever happened that we didn't want to happen, was set up exactly that way as a lesson. The same cosmic instructors we thank for blessings and success, sometimes have to trip us so we fall. Otherwise how would we know how to get up? Resilience is a skill that we never learn if life consists of easy wins, head pats and participation trophies. Just because we are being challenged doesn't mean we are being punished. Perhaps we are being chosen.
This week calls for us to low-key grow the fuck up. I don't even have a way to sugarcoat that, it just is what it is. My laptop charger broke today and I have so much work to do. I had a whole ass tantrum, got a pep talk, ordered a new charger and then typed this on my phone, because resilience dammit. Stand tall y'all. Let's pass this class so WE CAN GRADUATE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
Also, forgiveness. If we understand that fuck ups happen, then we can forgive those who trespassed against us, no? If we acknowledge that we've all fucked up, and we can't forgive those who have trespassed against us, even though we acknowledge that we too, are trespassers… yeah that's a test too. I hope we pass. And if we fail, I hope we forgive ourselves.
This week is a review of spiritual law; the lesson that what we say and believe creates our reality. The process of manifestation is logical and exact. And automatic. We are always creating our reality, whether we know it or not. Our minds are 24 hr manifestation machines. The universe wonders, are we committed to reaching the highest potential of our glorious mechanisms - regardless of how hard it is to work this thing? Or are we asleep at the switch, too overwhelmed to go back and read the instructions one more bleeping time? Maybe if we focused on our power as much as we focused on our fears, we wouldn’t have as much to be afraid of. You know how our parents used to say, “If you knew your math and science the way you know the lyrics to them rap songs...”
And that’s why the universe sends a gentle reminder this week that HELLO YOU CREATE YOUR OWN REALITY OK?! Your machine patiently awaits your next order, which will be carried out based on your consistent belief that it can be no other way except the way you say. Metaphorically speaking, we have nothing to wear but a bunch of too-tight thrift stores clothes but plot twist: we have a closet full of fabric and we can sew. This week we are being called to donate what don’t fit and custom make our lives.
Also, anything that is tangible, has value. Since we are tangible, we are able to be valued. Since we can be valued, WE ARE VALUABLE. Our own appraisal of our value is called SELF WORTH. Although our value to others is mutable, our self-worth to ourselves needs to be fixed. What we require when we exchange with others should not be based on their estimation of our value, but our own self estimation. Our self-esteem this week will directly correlate to our ability to DEMONSTRATE OUR WORTH by recognizing and eliminating situations that devalue us.
Removing ourselves from negotiations about non-negotiables will signal the universe to up-level our offers.
This week is built on avoiding explosion no matter how angry we feel. Standing our ground. Staying on our square.
We head into the New Year with the ability to manifest whatever we want. But making magic takes peace and clarity, and we don't feel peaceful at all.There is a certain relationship issue our minds keep circling around; just as we decide that for focus sake we don't care anymore, someone rushes back in to MAKE US CARE. On one hand we know we should leave the past alone, on the other hand we have something to say. We have a LOT to say.
But regardless of our original perspective, this is the week to consider the other side. A successful entry to the New Year requires a balanced view of the things we leave behind. Our advice this week is to master our own emotions, and not be moved by the ebb and flow of suppressed anger, resentment and deep love and longing that will surely arise. We must use our wisdom, flexibility and maturity to transmute any negative feelings into fuel to push us toward our best and highest selves.
No matter what happens this week, remember that everything is energy, and energy is neutral until we give it meaning. We must use the energy to remain focused on creating the life we want for ourselves, period. Relationships we buried because of a lack of reciprocity are turning over in their graves, wanting to rise and try again. Now that we have demonstrated our worth to the world but most importantly OURSELVES by refusing to beg for what we deserve, ghosts of our insecure past will gather around curious about the new laws of our heart. We don't owe them any answers. If we've learned anything in 2018, it's that no matter how we tell people to treat us, people gon’ do what they want.
As we move in 2019, let action be the only language we speak.
Predictably as we move into winter solstice, this week is about releasing what is dead so that new life can enter. There was a situation we pondered and pondered but could never quite figure out; suddenly we’ve realized that either the world is upside down or a complete shift in perspective is required. We may not know how to get there (despite the directions of the grownups, all the routes were detours), but we know where we want to be. As cheesy as it sounds during the holiday, our heart really is our guide.
This week is about endings. Deaths. The fire that calls down the rain to nourish the new sprouts. How can the tenders shoot up if the land has not been cleared? Our lives as caterpillars are over, and we observe the architecture of our interior selves crumble to glorious ruins. We are hypnotized by our own destruction, morbidly curious at how this kind of transformation could herald anything but a permanent and humiliating end. We are being pulled into some next version of ourselves that we can’t predict or understand. We are pure life force, searching for a form. This week is chrysalis.
Do caterpillars have regrets? Do they bemoan the grooves they never crawled, now that their legs have turned to soup? Do they hunger for another sunset, another breeze at dusk when the hot sidewalk is suddenly cool? Do they long for the days of fearing and needing the rain?
This week we will feel our twinges of sadness as the past shuts off the lights and locks the doors. We will mourn the places and faces to which we can never return. And then we will flex our wings (wings?! Where did those come from?) and fly.
After the cocoon, we bloom. O ye of little faith, why do you doubt?
Whatever happens this week is built upon whether or not we are doing our work. There’s inner work, outer work, work to be done in the dark and work to be done in the light. Whatever work we do will only be successful if we turn our backs on distractions and concentrate on the reality WE create. Focus is the crux of skill.
So this week requires a bit of willful blindness. Purposeful obliviousness. There are old patterns we’ve hold on to for far too long because they made us feel powerful, capable and stable. However if we pay very close attention we will notice that lately, no matter how many blessings these behaviors used to bring, now those same behaviors leave us weak, inept and uncertain. The universe is calling us forward.
And yet, its funny how moving forward can look like pausing to think and regression can look like plowing ahead. This week forms a paradox -- can we be wise enough to sit still and refuse to choose when we are not certain, when none of the options we’re presented with feel like the perfect fit? Can we face the fact that movement is only progress if its headed in the right direction?
Now that Mercury is out of retrograde (but still in shadow), we are ready to be direct. Maybe a little too direct. But have we fully integrated the lessons we’ve just learned or nah? Are we seeing clearly? Is our ego in check? Are we acting in the interest of the little “i” or the big “WE?” It’s easy to tell -- one makes us feel covetous while the other lets us breathe.
This is a willful ass week. Everybody’s feeling froggy and everybody can jump. Everyone has an opinion. Everyone wants a say. So our advice this week, wise ones, is to shut the hell up. LISTEN. Throwing our voices in the chorus will only make us hoarse. Wishes can’t be granted if the genie has been screamed to death. Everybody wants to speak to the man in charge, but we must remember that’s our name on the door. We are all the masters of our own damn fate, and the captains of our soul. So the best person for us to talk to this week is ourselves. It might make us look crazy -- but we know we’re conversing with the most powerful person in the room, the ONLY one who can give us what we want.
This week is powered by transmuting the energy of disappointment. Feeling trapped by our failures and unable to focus anything except what we’ve lost -- that’s called intensity. Intensity is a very useful kind of fuel, but only when used with the correct purpose and direction. To the extent that we are sad indicates our capacity for happiness, understand? We could focus on our misery, but we could also choose to focus on the fact that we’re in a prime position for joy.
As Mercury finishes up churning up the death waters of Scorpio this week, our magic lies in our ability to end what we need to end, and change what we need to change, and to allow the momentum of separation to thrust us toward our deepest desires. We are done being immobilized by emotions or indecision; no matter how we feel this week, we’re advised to work with it like a sculptor with clay. As long as we can change our focus and decide that whatever happens, happens for our highest good, then we can use the circumstances that present themselves to our advantage.
The word of the week is CONTROL. Control is a state of mind that emerges from the perception of power, not weakness. We are in control of our reality, regardless of how it appears. If what we thought we wanted seem to be moving in the opposite direction, we must take that as a sign that the universe is removing what was good enough to make space for our perfect match. Feelings of abandonment may come up this week, but we are warned against chasing any thing that dares show us its back. We must remain firmly grounded in our seat of power, knowing that man’s rejection is God’s protection.
Sometimes when things fall apart, they are really falling together.
This week is built on speaking up. Whatever happens will be a result of us opening our mouths and letting what is in our hearts rise up into the light. Whatever we awaken in ourselves was dormant so long that the universe took note and rearranged herself to put us back in alignment. We will be turned, as if by the hand of fate, towards our deepest memories and strongest emotions, towards the people and places that for better or worse, are the root of who we truly are.
This week is built upon the compromises prerequisite to relationship stability, where inevitably someone can’t have what they want so the other person can. And the person who doesn’t get what they want doesn’t mind (too much), because they are getting WHO they want.
But I’m getting ahead of myself. First, the showdown. We’re headed into battle this week, either internally or externally or both. All the voices inside and/or outside our heads have an opinion, and they revive the topic even when we’d rather let it die. We are at war with ourselves for peace this week, and this fight feels a little too familiar. We've invested this energy before and we did not receive a return on our investment. So we’re done wasting our time, period, point blank. That’s it. Snip snap. Hands washed. It is the logical thing to do. Life is too short for poor choices.
Guess we shouldn't talk about that big ass cup of love that's going to wash over us then. Since we made up our minds and all. But, ahem - spoiler alert: the universe is asking us to make our decision again, and to speak directly into the microphone this time. Blame it on the retrogrades, but we are being asked to say it louder for the ones in the back. People will be coming at us full speed to make something happen, so we better say again what we said if we meant what we said, and if not, we better say what we mean. We can have the love; that’s why these opportunities are coming back around. But love ain't Burger King. Only one of us can have it our way.
This week is about the reality we've built with our eyes open and our wisdom fully displayed, head held high, despite all the ways we’ve devalued ourselves in relationships, all the ways we hurt our own feelings, all the ways we've cut folks out and moved on, lied and crept back, confused ourselves, worried ourselves, died to the whole cycle and rose again. We’ve looked within and re-evaluated, and now we know what we want. Hopefully we’ve realized that if we’re waiting for someone else to give or become what we need, we will be waiting for FUCKING EVER. You know the best thing about love? Everybody needs it and everybody has it, so everybody can give it to themselves.
Venus retrograde taught us, and Mercury retrograde is about to remind us, that we have the power we seek. It is our emotions that make us forget, but…
Well you know how the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result? What if we took the energy that we always, always, always, always, put into the goal of getting someone else to love us, and for once in our lives but ALL that energy into loving our own selves?
And do you know the best thing you can give yourself? The highest act of self love?
Clarity. Knowing who you are and what you require at all times. Now that you know what you need, you shall have it -- because YOU had it all along. Nobody’s body is home but your body, therefore you cannot be left out. You ARE the in.
This week rests on friendship, relationship, connection. What is emotion anyway? How does energy move between ourselves and others? What is this magical energy in motion that allows people to get carried away in their love and longing for each other?
Perhaps there are some relationships in our lives that we’ve just given up because the energy just isn’t there. We fought the good fight, we tried to protect it -- we even gave the matter over to the Almighty. But the time comes for all things to die, no matter how much prayer and begging we do. Sometimes the death IS the answer to our prayer. If we can face that truth and allow ourselves to go through the grieving process, then we can be delivered to the other side. If Goddess herself is no longer putting energy into something, then it’s out of our hands. When energy transitions to another place, we must go with it. We can only thrive where life lives. Whatever is crumbling must be permitted to fall, so that the creator can rebuild in a manner that is pleasing to her.
This week we are writhing in our emotions, our hidden feelings, our secret places. We are feeling the things we rarely look at in the light. Our obstacle is faith, whether or not we have the strength to meet Goddess halfway when it comes to co-creating our deepest desires. If we believe our treasure is coming, we must clean house to create space. We must be honest about the seeds occupying soil in our lives that never, ever gave us a reward for our effort, no matter how diligently we tended the earth. We must be honest about our failures. And yet even as logic screams at us to cut our losses and throw it all away, we can’t help but hope that if we just work a little harder, just give it one more chance…
Our hearts are bigger than we ever imagined this week, and with big hearts come hope. And it has been said a time or two that with hope, anything is possible. Our advice this week is to keep our emotions steady while we balance them with our thoughts. Mind and heart must work together; neither know the way alone. We must be wary of blindly defending what we have always defended; but so must we also be wary of hastily abandoning that to which we have always been loyal. This is the week to let the universe fight our battles while we get a little rest.
New opportunities -- and possibly RENEWED opportunities -- are heading toward us this week. We don’t have to do anything except relax, refresh, and quite possibly -- reconsider. We are hesitant to rush to OR from anyone this week, because rushing at all in either direction will result in a missed opportunity. This week we need to let the magic of love, friendship & emotion play all around us, and allow that magic to reveal certain aspects of close relationships that we might otherwise miss.
This week reminds us to get back to our heart, because love is the opposite of fear. No matter what is happening in our lives, we are getting another chance to show it what we’re made of. What is our spiritual law? Who or what is our authority? What are the rules of our integrity? What are our values? What is our value? We must train our spirits to be courageous by deciding that as long as we are playing life by rules we respect, win or lose, it's a good game. Win or lose, the questions we should be asking are: What did we learn? What do we know that we didn’t know before? Who are we that we weren’t before?
This week is about releasing commitments that feel like burdens, even if doing so causes us to feel vulnerable, weak and exposed. Why should that matter, if we are free? We are being asked to show emotional maturity by giving our time and attention only to the energies we want to see renewed in our lives. It’s time to apply our hard won wisdom and prove to ourselves that we don’t just talk about it, we be about it. Everything we want is on the other side of everything we fear, and we must allow that truth to penetrate the darkness as we push the fuck through.
Perhaps there is a situation that makes us feel stable but takes too much from us in the name of stability. We are done sacrificing. We are done being lost in illusion, in love with the fantasy of possibility. This week is about the here and now, and letting the river the of the past wash itself away. We are finally facing forward.
It won’t take us long to experience complete faith in our own journey no matter who is on it with us. Our advice this week is not to worry if we need to leave or if we are left. Abandonment is only an illusion. We are in the mystical in-between, being delivered from one realm to the next; as soon as we let go of the cloth of this reality, a new one will materialize in front of our faces, one that shows us there was nothing at all to be afraid of.
May we use the momentum of the dark as we burst into the light. No one can stay in the womb forever.
It’s time to be reborn, all of us from love, our births highly anticipated.